as my social web expands and contracts (presently in the former stratum) I find myself realizing how much I value my independance. I am so fortunate to be so free. no one depends on me but myself. no ones happiness but my own. besides my family, (and my job which I could go on and on about…but won’t) I can’t and won’t depend on anyone for anything. there is absolutely nopoint in having expectations for others. having them only for onesself, can we derive/experience true happiness - when we meet and exceed our own personal goals.
so.. I don’t need anyone. however, I do *want* someone. it would be spectacular to make love on a regular basis. I suppose that’s just about all that’s missing right now; that is, in a realistic goal sort’ve way. I use the phrase ‘make love’ because it’s quite apparent to me that if I was just after sex, boy howdy, I’m certain I would have it. my standards are above it all - I’ve been gifted grave control over my own horemones and bodily urges. it feels good to know I’m not dependant on someone else to make me feel good. I choose to be where I am.
(I wonder how long this little bubble of non-self-loathing will last….)
/end transmission
Post a Comment