the story behind the name is long and sorta sappy, but I won’t go into much of that. here’s the short relavent version:
Naraku is a Japanese word with many translations:
kanji: 奈落
katakana:ならく
english:naraku - (n) hell, hades, eternity, theater basement
- what Naraku use to mean to me:
- eternity is what we had in mind. it was, for a time, the word and symbol of our love. first love’s forever, right? yeah, right. so that’s it. since that’s been over for nearly 5 years, it has become my domain name of choice and will remain in my possession until an act of God or otherwise forces me to give it up. actually the word has proven quite ironic - considering its other meanings and the demise of the said us.
- what Naraku now means to me:
- first of all, I like alliterations: Nate’s Naraku Net. I suggest everyone use more of em. they tickle the tongue and the tympanic tunnel. in addition, the word Naraku itself sounds cool no matter what language or dialect you speak. try it.
- trouble pronouncing? listen here - nate’s naraku network, I am dork hear me roar.
- Is there really such a negative connontation for this word among Japanese? I’ll find out, special report due out soon.
- what Naraku is not:
- an inuyasha character, seriously. most of my search engine hits are from that little shit. while he does sound like a badass villian, he has absolutely no place on this site. wikipedia’s entire entry on naraku is devoted to him.
- an underworld solice for myself; it has evolved a lot since then. the word has taken on a new meaning for me - for a long time it served as a destination for my depressed thoughts. now that much of the need for that is gone, a new name may be more appropriate… special report on new name due soon.
FREE AND FUCKING PROUD:
no diseases inflict myself or my loved ones; no poverty strickens me or my loved ones; no shame upon myself or my family; no debt; no life path inhibiting responsibilities; no dishonesty in the way that I live my life;
free from commitment to anyone but myself; from assholes and their selfish natures; free to love whom ever I choose; free to spend my money how I choose; free to move where ever and whenever I please;
pride in my body; pride in my sense of style; pride in (some of) my work; pride in my family, despite our troubles and shortcomings; pride in my house; proud of (most) of my decisions; proud when I crack jokes no one gets but I know are good, and in my sense of humor in general;
what are you free from? what are you proud of? happy independance day.
listen to me recite this blahog
ok, call me a pansy, but I can’t watch certain drama’s unfold. lately I’ve been watching Rescue Me and this fuckin’ guy - played by dennis leary (main character) - is such a fuckup asshole liar, he almost always has his way. and now that it’s about to come crashing down, a face off between ex he still loves yet lies to relentlessly and his new booty call both equally hott, I can’t watch!? it’s so bad, so contrived, and very thoroughly thought out, that it’s good? I don’t get it.. it’s sorta the same awkwardenjoyness I sense when I watch The Office. weird.
I wish I wuz tired…..
listen to this blahog
cool stuff:
- spoke with a very sweet canadian girl who hooked up the sprint freebie of 7pm N&W - byebye verizon!
- played guitar for close to an hour.
- had a good work out.
- lovin’ my new headlights and my car in general.
- got some stuff done at work; the day went by quickly.
lame shit:
- no calls from “friends.”
- cell dropped the call w/canadian girl Amanda never to be heard of or from again.
- barely spoke w/intern guy today, why doesn’t anyone ask me questions? seriously, this is starting to bug the shit out of me (EVERYWHERE, not just work.)
- filled up the gas tank: $45 - somehow down to 27.666 mpg.
- roommate (or respective gf) stole my fucking conditioner; really fucking aggrivated the fact that that bathroom has NEVER been cleaned in any shape or form by my soon to be ex-roommate in nearly *2* years. an impressive streak, nonetheless.
- by the end of the work day, the little aggrivations were borderline pissing me the fuck off.
- *I* need some fucking evening relief/relaxation - working out doesn’t seem to be doing it.
- slightly freaking out about not having any close-friends all of a sudden.
- slept like shit last night; have a strong feeling I have another restless/sleepless night ahead of me…
listen to this blahog
I can’t come up with a song tonight. I have had so much time to do something productive today. ZILCHO NADA NOTHIN. fucking shit I’m bothered. so fuck you world I can’t even stand being apart of it. work is going to be just the same shit tomorrow as it was last week. it’s fine. fine shit. fine if my well being wasn’t complete shit otherwise. I went above and beyond normalness for me yesterday, and what difference did it make today? nada zilch NOTHING. FUCK. F U C K THE NEW SCENT FROM cK FOR MEN. SMELLS LIKE SHIT BECAUSE IT IS.
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my friends, to some of you I directly distributed the documentary “Loose Change 2nd Ed.” who’s purpose was to present “the truth” of 9/11. therefore I feel somewhat obligated to present this as well.
I admit, I bought into the theories presented fairly readily and excitedly. partially due to the fact that I am, as most of us are, extremely fed up with the current administration, so I feverishly accepted much of the slander and conspiracy without much thought or any research of my own.
today I came across and ended up reading all the way through (suprising for lazy me) this well researched counter-point article to the Loose Change film:
http://www.ccdominoes.com/lc/LooseChangeGuide.html
it is a thorough and critical debunking of the theories and statements presented in Loose Change. if Loose Change fascinated you, so will this.
eventhough the article/guide’s author has a personal vendetta against the Loose Change creators, as shown by his mostly unnecessary sarcastic remarks and shit tossings, he brings additional facts and questions the Loose Change film neglects. it is a little bothersome that he lays into them so negatively at times, but I suppose that’s the name of the game. my most shocking revalation was discovering how obscenely questionable the flim’s evidence sources came from. guys like karl schwarz are no where near credible enough for the films conclusions. google him and you too will quickly see why.
please, if you saw, or plan to see “Loose Change” also spend some time going through this guide.
my lesson today: stay skeptical, especially of the skeptics.
listen to this blahog
related links:
- the DOD released a video of Flight 77 striking the Pentagon on 9/11, TODAY. the clip is of terrible quality and basically proves nothing beyond a shadow of a doubt. it will only fuel Conspiracy Theorists further.
- karl schwarz int’l man of mystery?
the musical conoseuir will undoubtedly recognize the foremost reason for the title of this song.
funny how inspiration strikes us.
enjoy.
listen to song “outoftune”
I know the current color scheme is ugly as sin. I will *attempt* to fix tomorrow if I have tyme.
MIDDLESYDE!?
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so for awhile now, I’ve been struggling with just about every fucking thing. the only things I’ve been able to do consistently are those I’ve adopted into my routine months ago. deviations from that are far and few between. I have this awful attitude towards everything.
I don’t want to do anything.
it’s not even that I don’t want to do it, it’s that I mentally CAN’T. like there’s some fucking billion-brick blockade in my brain that keeps me from changing.
is it fear of change, rejection, work, what, WHAT THE FUCK. do I blame my parents??? seems to work for celebrities!
today’s typical psychologist/drug pusher would simply say: “change your attitude, with these magic pills! and come pay, er uh, see me once a week for the next 6-12 months”
I don’t want to take drugs anymore. NO MORE DRUGS. I want to be…..ME.
who the fuck thought it was a good idea to fill people’s heads with the concept that we should always be happy. always be pretty. always be excited. (dr. phil, I’m lookin at you) frankly, it’s inhuman. and it depresses the living fuck out of me. the only people who achieve this floaty fake reality on a regular basis are drug addicts and ignorant idiots. and I swear, 90% of society is among them.
…I sure hope moving my ass out of Chico helps…
listen to this blahog
